Words by Jimmy Glinster
Now, you all know how much I hate when bands call their genre Post something or other, and I make no exceptions for this mob of hooligans. Unfortunately, the world’s first Post- Nu-Metal supergroup has arrived, and they go by the name of The Violent Inzident. And yes, that’s a Z instead of a C, cause Nu-Metal and shit.
They tell us that this unhealthy mix of comedy and parody will have Nu-Metal fans taking their Korn and Slipknot albums to cash converters faster than you can say chocolate starfish and the water flavored hotdog! And yeah, it just might.
What I can’t figure out, though, is if these guys are serious or if they are just 100% taking the piss. They say it’s a piss take, but they seem to enjoy themselves way too much while doing it. And why wouldn’t they. As much as you all say you hated Nu-Metal, the math just doesn’t add up. The record sale numbers of the genre alone, not to mention the individual artists outweigh just about everything metal, that’s not Nu-Metal, before and after the explosion and demise of the genre.
Did it ever really die, though? Some of the genre’s biggest artists are still around today, and they are still selling out bigger venues than your favourite Post-Death-Symphonic-Melodic- Black-Metal-Pirate band. Even the kings Limp Bizkit, the world’s greatest band ever, and their fearless leader Fred Durst, the man solely responsible for the genre’s demise, are drawing crowds even though everyone apparently hates them.
But I digress, this is not about Nu-Metal, this is about Post Nu-Metal. Whatever the fuck that is? This album sounds just like Nu-Metal to me. The best and the disgustingly worst of it. It’s got the rap, the rock, the screams, the big singalong choruses, and it’s even got the motherfucking bounce.
I could go through this album track by track, riff by riff, and tell you exactly where the riffs and lyrics were borrowed from, but that would spoil all the fun for you. Instead, I’ll give you a quick list of the bands that The Violent Inzident have decided to take the piss/pay homage to. There’s some blatant System of a Down, some Korn straight from the cob, a little not so Limp Bizkit, more of a half chub, Deftones, Soulfly, Marilyn Manson (not nu-metal, just a fucking creep), Slipknot, Disturbed, P.O.D, Coal Chamber and even what I thought was a touch of Hed (P.E.).
I could be wrong, though, and this could all be completely original work. The Violent Inzident could be the greatest Nu-Metal band ever. I mean, they missed the mark by about 20 years or so, but I guess you gotta relive your glory days once you hit your midlife crisis. Not that I’m saying these guys are a bunch of jaded old bastards that never quite made it, because I wouldn’t know. They dress like the Wish version of Slipknot, crossed with the late 90’s jumpsuit stylings of Machine Head in The Burning Red era. The best MH era by the way.
Oh, what’s that, you didn’t realise I was a Nu-Metal fan? I guess you’ve had your head, or at last your finger, up your ass this whole time. I just like what’s good, and some of it was real fucking good. Some of it was real fucking bad too, and this album This Is Nu Metal! gives you the best of both worlds. You’ll have to figure out what’s good and what’s bad yourself, though. But first you’ll have to figure out whether the band are straight up taking the piss, or if they are paying homage to their fallen heroes.
Honestly, I think it’s a bit of both, but they’ll probably never admit to it because being into Nu-Metal was never cool, and still isn’t. This album is fucking (PH) fat though, and it bounces like a phat kid on a trampoline. Spike your hair up, connect your wallet chain and pull up those dickies … only halfway though, cause you’re in for one hell of an ass reaming good time.
Go on, go get in on for the Nookie!