Pix by Just Ignore The Camera Photography
I got into the Brewhouse End of Year Party ’23 at the Chardon’s Corner Hotels Backroom just before 3pm after having to work my day job in the morning and being delayed for an hour or so due to another severe weather event. Yeah, it’s summer in Australia, or more specifically Queensland where we literally have severe weather events every second day. You gotta love Summer, right?
Fuck No I don’t!
Anyway, there is a fair fucking whack of a crowd early on and luckily this place has got air conditioning. Not that it’s hot outside at the moment, but like I said before, it’s Summer and ya just never know!
Friendly Fire were rocking out some rap metal that sounded like a heavy version of MC Hammer’s Addam’s Groove. Does anyone remember that one from the OG Addams Family movies back in the 90’s? You know the ones where we all developed a childhood crush on Christina Ricci which finally came to a climax in 2006’s Black Snake Moan? Yeah, some of us are that old around here. But I digress, the following track was their last one that I didn’t catch the name of because I had to quickly sneak off for a piss after the 1hr long drive to get up here.
A quick check-in with the man responsible for this event Mick Brew, leads me to discover that Black Banner have pulled out due to Man Flu … or something of the likes. Now that I have a filthy little run sheet in my possession, I head to the main stage to catch Zagtar who launch in with a heavy rolling baseline which they very quickly start grinding along to. I’m not sure what this reminds me of, but it has some 90’s NY hardcore flavour to it, crossed with touches of classic San Fran thrash. The bass tone is amazingly dirty and is driving the whole band. They drop a song about amputating your limb to survive, and at some point, a little later, some bloke with an Adriatic singlet and a flanno around his waist jumps up for a bit of a co-scream.
I’ll try to get some info about the earlier bands at some point, but at the moment everyone is too busy moshing front of house. The singer directs the crowd for a circle pit with his finger, and fuck me, we get one at 3pm. If that’s how we are gonna start the day, then let the good times roll! They ended with one called Open the Grinder which took ‘em a few goes to kick into, but I think that was just some show banter. Well, I thought they finished but it turns out they have time for one more. Such a grinding good time!
After fucking off quickly to grab some Taco Bell, and the dumb fucks giving us the spicy option we walk back into Rumblestone rocking out their final track. These guys are dressed in very short cut-off jeans, and tucked-in button-up shirts which stand out like dogs’ balls amongst the black shirts. As does their brand of surf punk amongst the metals. These guys seem like fun, it’s a shame I didn’t get to catch more of them.
Magnetron spend no time fucking around and quickly kick into a set of thumping thrash. I just noticed there is a second drum kit on stage with some crazy little chick playing the fuckers with her bare hands. The next track is called Skin which is quite fitting for those bare hands slapping those drum skins. I generally struggle to take any guitarist seriously that plays any kind of Dime, even those weird pointy ones, and these fuckers have both got em. Lucky for them, they can both play so I’ll let it fly this time.
Some bloke in corpse paint jumps up for a little bit of screamy screamy in a bit more of a groovier little number, and I’m not sure if it’s because of those Dimes but there are touches of Southern Groove poking through all over the place as the set progresses.
Next up on the main stage is Vomit Bomb. This has got to be the best stage getup I have ever seen. 90’s Canberra Raiders uniform with Video Ezy Jersey, shorts, socks and fucking head gear, head gear. As an added little bit of flavour, he’s also got some wraparound polarized shades. Then the mad cunt makes a sloppy fart noise and confirms that’s the sound of MDMA making its way through his lower colon, or something like that. More chat about doing it for the boys, and then all of a sudden, they kick into some heavily punk-flavoured thrash.
These guys are already fucking entertaining just a minute and thirty seconds into their set … which was the end of the first song. A quick dig about Centrelink is followed by some more thrash, and the song after that is about the Mad Dog. These guys seem to have a bit of a bogan theme, I guess you could call it Bogan Thrash. Imagine a thrash version of The Chats. They throw in a track called Speed Dealers after some more shit talking. I’d like to tell ya all the jokes, but I don’t wanna spoil the show.
Oh, and I remember this band now, it’s the “Go to The Pub” band, I’ve reviewed these guys before. I have just been reminded simultaneously by my wife and Krispy that this is actually a Cosmic Psychos song, but it was these guys who I saw perform it last.
Awaken the Hate jump on the second stage and I take a minute to chat to some people instead of blatantly ignoring everyone. Also, because I reviewed these guys about a month ago down at Mo’s Desert Clubhouse on the Gold Coast, so I’ll leave it up to you do a bit of a search on here for that one. All you need to know for now though is the crowd is having a good time as the band throws down a killer set for what is only their third show.
Back over on the main stage is Chunk Norris, and I’m not usually into reviewing cover bands but they rip into a cover of Pantera’s Mouth for War which instantly grabs my attention. Then they do a Rage Against the Machine cover and I lose interest. Master of Puppets quickly grabbed my attention again though, but then they played some song that neither I nor the crowd knew. Cowboys From Hell sure as fuck grabbed everyone’s attention again though, as did Holy Wars … The Punishment Due. Holy Fuck, what an epic cover to take on, and what a great attempt!
Are You Ready? Just kidding, you fucking Freak On A Leash. I think we all need some Chop Suey while we Wait & Bleed for the Brr Brr Deng.
Event host Mick and the rest of his Dirty Brew take the second stage next for some rocking good times. And you’re never gonna bring me down but in a moment of despair, Mick loses his drink. If you know Mick, you’d know how much despair this would cause the poor man. Please take a minute of silence for Mick … fuck that, these cunts are rockin’ loud. Who needs silence anyway? If you’ve caught Dirty Brew before, you know that they throw down some heavy southern grooves mixed with some very interesting vocal work.
There certainly isn’t anything regular about Regular Gonzales who take to the main stage. This 3-piece and their heavy broken grooves are unstoppable, even though they stop quite often in really awkward places. Don’t even bother with time signatures, this shits whack, in a good way! Stoyan from Adriatic joins ‘em for the next song, and for those who don’t know, the frontman for Gonzales is also the drummer for Adriatic. It’s that incestuous local music scene thing. Oh, and then there’s that Sharp Dressed Man cover that they always throw in. Such a good time!
Krave are up next on the second stage, and they quickly grab the crowd’s full attention. The crowd very quickly started banging their heads over the front barrier and the band in response were super energetic and bouncing all over the stage. I’ve been watching this band for a while now and following a recent touring run, they’ve really stepped it up to a new level. And just when ya think it can’t get any better, Si from Massic jumps up onstage and joins in on the vocal attack.
You know a band is putting on a good show when all the higher-billed bands are standing in the front row to watch. A crazy little mosh pit ensues. There’s nothing quite like a good clap-along section followed up in the next song by a circle pit. Strange turn of events that one. Nek minnut … crowd surfer. What a performance. Keep your eye on this band!
We The Hollow take the main stage with their own breed of masked mayhem. The crowd is thick and every piece of crowd barrier both FOH and side of stage are taken. These guys just keep going from strength to strength and I am glad our little misunderstanding from the last time I reviewed them has been cleared up!
Anyway, back to the show, it’s rocking heavy and hard, and the melodic vocals that push through here and there offer some relief for the full-blown ear infection I have after spending two days in the pool, escaping the heat while I was waiting for our power to come back on. Yeah, tornados and shit.
Oh, they just did the song I love, and the lyric, and the crowd loved it. Fuck me, that got a standing ovation. Well, everyone was already standing, but it was still one hell of an ovation. There’s one song left, and I have no idea what it’s called, but it’s a goddam fucking banger! Oh, and there goes the guitarist out into the crowd somewhere. I’ll end this by saying this, and what I’ve said before, that I do actually really like this band.
Something very brutal just started happening over on Stage 2. Oh, it’s Snake Mountain, I shall shuffle over there. Wow, that guitar has 8 strings. I struggled enough getting my head around the fact that the 7th string on a seven-string was an extra low note. What the fuck is the 8th one, an extra low, low note? Like, the brown note? Who knows, but the young fella playing it sure does know how to use ‘em all. On, and Nev just fucking channeled Satan or something. That shit was evil.
I can see cocks on stage, so that must mean F.U.C. Is about to take the stage, at which point if those mankinis slip, we might see some more cocks. But first we slip across the road for some pizza. When we return, F.U.C. are up to their last song and there is actually now a life-sized cock walking around onstage.
It’s a song about Elephants which may or may not be a reference to swinging trunks. Apparently, they’ve been F.U.C., and we’ve been shit!
It’s now time for Adriatic on stage 2, and like half the bands tonight, I swear I reviewed these guys yesterday. Well, it was back in November at Wallapalooza to be accurate. Not to spoil the surprise, but I’ll put money on Sam Wolstenholme from Aeon Nexus and formerly Seraphic jumping up onstage at some point. And there’s the megaphone, or mini phone, or whatever that thing is. Oh, and there is Si stepping in for another visit. The bloke just can’t help himself. And there Sam is for Lighthouse in The Desert and apparently a few more to come, but in the end You and me will make history.
Here I go again, reviewing a tribute show … is that even a thing? Well, it seems to be in My Generation, well at least it was on the cruise ship a few weeks back … but more about that later.
Someone shouts out “that was better than Limp Bizkit, fuck Fred”! The drummer loses his earphones, but the show keeps Rollin, and it turns out that My Way ain’t the highway, and I stay to review Counterfeit – The Australian Limp Bizkit Show. It’s so gold, it’s so gold, it’s so golden now … so suck my dick, or something like that. A few cracks about cocaine makes me think these guys just might be Living It Up, living life in the fast lane. Maybe there’s a bigger story Behind those dilated Blue Eyes.
I guess it would be nice, if I could touch your body … but I’d probably get arrested for that. You gotta have Faith though. So, I quickly Take a Look Around to check for Counterfeits in this Boiler, but all I found was 46 fucks in this fucked up rhyme, so I guess it’s about time we got in on for the Nookie.
With only one more song to go, it must be time to Break Stuff.
And on that note, it’s been a big day and a big show of support for the local music scene. Big thanks to Mick Brew for putting on a killer show full of killer acts! Let’s do this again some time!